Gloomy, Rainy, Dreamy

Today is gloomy as usual. My holiday is actually realllyy boring as hell. Today... I've browsed about my childhood friends, my squad in the middle school, everything about my past.

As 18 y.o young lady, I miss being a kid. Like, passing grades with great score, winning a championship, running around the field just like a fool, meeting your lovable friends..., without thinking anything else.

I miss being pure-innocent-white angel.

As the rain drops... well, how do I express this?

Does rain make us brood? Thinking which is right, which is wrong, what are you supposed to do, what are you going to be, listing your dreams, and so on.

I'm raised pretty well by Mom, and I hope she's proud of her perfectionist, feminisit, idealist, sometimes bossy daughter who has strong willed and guts inside her. I'm kinda person who'll give 99% (well, 100% is for God, no one's perfect) and try to be the best. Well what I mean is, I'll get easily upset whenever I get B though I know that I deserve an A because I just know and believe in my ability. My thought is.. I can give you 99% so 70% isn't enough. And I have this curiosity issue which can't be handled. If something went wrong, pasti gue selalu mempertanyakannya sampai gue mendapatkan jawaban yang masuk akal.

Well as I describe my self before... I'm worried about my future.

I'm a full time dreamer, YES, but as I grow... I'm wondering, "Can I reach those dreams?"

I have a diary of my dreams and I also stick it on my wall - as I said before in some of my previous post-. They doubt me and laugh at my dreams. But.. I always have this faith right inside me that soon I'll reach it.

But today... I don't know...
Do I doubt my self? Can't I believe in my ability? Am I saying that my dreams are impossible?

I always wanted to work at UN / Google, being an ambassador for UNICEF and helping children among the nations to get a proper education, fighting human and animal rights, protecting the wildlife, well.. ANY WORKS THAT RELATED TO HUMANITY, CREATIVITY, AND TRAVELLING. I'll be the Indonesian version of Audrey Hepburn and Oprah Winfrey. Are those dreams too high to be true?

But how do I accomplish those? Even to my self, it's a hard question to be answered. I need to be an inspiration for the others, a role model to every youngster (especially for a girl), a trust from the crowd, and yet... I'm trying to be that. Maybe... just maybe, from the scale of 1 to 10, so far I only get 5.

Please dear my readers, don't EVER doubt your dreams like I just did in this post.

Know your dreams, learn how to reach it, and don't lose faith. Xoxo.

Comments

Pancasila, Nasionalisme, dan Eyangkung

Mungkin Eyangkung (Eyang Kakung, Kakek dalam bahasa Jawa) benci disebut-sebut sebagai pahlawan. Tapi, memang kenyataannya begitu. Tidak akan ada Indonesia tanpa Eyangkung dan para pahlawan yang lain. Eyangkung saya bernama Eyang Toegijo Kartosandjojo, beliau lahir di Solo pada 17 Agustus 1919. Eyangkung bersekolah di Neutrale H. I. S Solo dan beliau berprestasi di sekolahnya. Karena prestasi itulah beliau dibebaskan dari les persiapab masuk M. U. L. O. dan pada akhirnya beliau berhasil masuk tanpa melalui tes ujian masuk. Sebagai cucu kesekian, saya sangat bangga mempunyai sosok Eyangkung. Karena beliau, saya selalu bersumpah akan membawa nama baik keluarga. Saya nggak mau menjelekkan nama baik keluarga besar, saya nggak mau dibilang, "cucu pahlawan kok seperti itu?" (Walaupun saya ini memang tergolong bandel sih, cuma bandelnya masih sebatas wajar). Walaupun beliau wafat setahun sebelum saya lahir, banyak cerita yang sudah saya dengar maupun foto-foto beliau yang saya l...

AFS Frequently Asked.

Where and when can I apply? Every student who is in 10th grade during the application period can apply for the departure in the following year. You apply by using our online application system. What and how much should I write about me in the application? You will provide the most accurate information about yourself. The information you write will be used in the selection process in chapter and national levels. I am not living in Java and the next chapter is far. Do I have to pay the travel costs to the selection location myself? During the chapter selection stages, domestic travel expenses will be your responsibility. Departure in March or August – advantages and disadvantages? Departure time depends on when the academic year starts in the hosting country. Both departure time will give you chance to experience a whole academic year from the beginning to the end, and hopefully will give you a “full” experience as a high school student abroad. What happens at th...

The Fangirling Moment When They Talk About F1

I'd never talk about this though I should!! So I've watched F1 since in the 9th grade, and I only knew about Sebastian Vettel back then. My chairmate, Salsa, has a HUGE crush on him so I was her victim everytime she was fangirling. Like it or not, I listened to those craps. Then... I was feeling "What's so good with Vettel" and I started to watch F1. At the moment, BOOM, HE IS GOOD. I was starting to be his fan back then. Up until now, I'm still his fans and now I know some of racers which is COOL! Salsa may loves Vettel to death, but I ship Hamilton more than Vettel. Lol. But seriously, Hamilton is really cute! He's a total pro! He was the 1st racer ever that won in such young age (before Vettel broke his record). But... Hamilton is always be my... imaginary brother? Hamilton looks like he's a rapper instead of racer, though. He has this swag that makes him more adorable and cute. Then then then, I've heard about Rio Haryanto joins F1 for Ma...

She's Chloe Moretz

Haiiii!!!! Ini namanya Chloe Grace Moretz atau yang biasa dikenal sebagai Chloe Moretz. Chloe lahir di Atlanta, Georgia, 10 Februari 1997. Chloe adalah seorang actress rangkap seorang model yang emang kariernya lagi naik banget sekarang. I'm totally in love with her. Acting -nya itu terlalu bagus untuk anak sebaya kita. Waktu casting Hugo, Chloe malah pake logat Inggris gituuu... Sutradaranya ngira dia adalah orang Inggris. She fooled him! :p Terus, karena dia itu model...... Her styles, kiblat fashion nya itu emang terlalu enak untuk dijadiin contoh. Gayanya unik, anggun, elegant, edgy, tapi tetep casual. Two thumbs up for her. Bajunya, sepatunya, clutchnya... *.* Her eyes is too pretty Liat gayanya deh. SO kewl. She loves wearing sun glasses Her dress is too chic. Combine it with those shoes! Photoshoot untuk apa gitu..... 0.0 Her dress! Her headband! Di acaranya Calvin Klein Another things yang gue suka dari Chloe...

An Open Letter

Dear my friends, This is my open letter about college life. Saya akhir-akhir ini lebih banyak berdiam diri dan membaca buku. Lalu, memperluas pengetahuan saya dan menjalin hubungan dengan orang-orang baru, berusaha menjadi objektif ke setiap orang. Saya harus berterima kasih kepada beberapa orang karena telah menjadikan saya seperti sekarang ini, Nita yang bersiap-siap untuk menyambut usia kepala 2 sebentar lagi. Which means , saya perlahan-lahan berubah menjadi young adult . Bukan anak picisan lagi. Semoga. Hehe. Semakin dewasa saya semakin sadar jika inner circle yang saya miliki semakin mengecil, dan saya bersyukur karena Tuhan telah memberikan orang-orang terbaik pilihan-Nya di dalam kehidupan saya. Semakin dewasa saya sadar jika tidak semua orang akan menjadi temanmu, beberapa akan ada yang menjadi musuhmu dan berusaha menggunjingkanmu. Semakin dewasa saya sadar jika terkadang semua hal tidak akan berjalan sesuai dengan keinginanmu. Semakin dewasa saya harus semakin menerima k...

Expect the Unexpected

Search This Blog